I got a good report at the doctor, a good report at work, and a good report at home. Everybody seems okay with me right now. I know that can’t be entirely true. Undoubtedly, somebody’s had their fill with the likes of yours truly. I can think of at least a couple. Possibly scores of others.
If that’s the case, I don’t want to know.
I’ve been called a “people pleaser.” I’ve actually grown fond of the moniker. But eventually it’s unhealthy. I don’t know exactly when, but it’s got to be sometime before you apologize for being insulted.
Yeah, that happened.
When verbal blows fly, I just want out. But I’m learning I can’t be responsible for everyone’s happiness. I’d like to be, but who do I think I am, Jesus or something?
LOL.
Efforts to be a Jesus disciple are good, but alas. Try as I may to give it all to Him, dang it, sometimes I just hurt.
I’ve been called “too sensitive.” Okay. That stinks. So I give my cares to God. Let Him be my shield. So grateful for that go-to.
But then something breaks and stabs my soul, and I just can’t shake it. I just have to shut up, pray, and wait it out. Emphasis on “shut up.” Words are dangerous. Thankfully, God eventually provides some perspective. He’s good like that.
Lest I sound like a victim, I realize I can be a turd. I can be impatient, critical, and short-tempered, often when sleep deprived. Sleep has become the second most important thing, right after loving God. Without it, I still love God, but I sure struggle loving others.
And I can justify my actions as well as the next guy. Everyone’s got good reasons for bad behavior. “I’m just tired” is popular. How about, “I’ve got a lot on my mind.” Better yet, “I’m not perfect.”
We all admit we’re imperfect, but struggle to admit to specifics. Like the old, “If I said something to offend you, I’m sorry but…”
Classic.
So live another day. Each one is a gift. Be grateful. Think of others as better than you. (The bible actually says that!) It helps keep me in check when somebody does something stupid. Perhaps then I won’t think too highly of myself.
And no complaints. My doctor? Boss? Wife? All good right now.
I’m gonna lay low.