Aggressive salespeople. They swarm the giant malls. I struggle. “Keep eyes forward and conversation going,” I tell myself. If I look up, one of the aggressive salespeople will latch on like a tick.
Turns out they don’t care how you’re doing or where you’re from. If they catch your eye, they’ll trap you into a question and answer session leading smack into a time share.
Lois is better at this. “Just ignore them,” she says. “I know it’s rude. But that’s what you have to do.”
If they speak to me I intuitively reply. Suddenly, they’re following me down the mall, badgering me about my hopes and dreams.
I try. “How you doing guys?” “No thanks.” “On vacation?” “No thanks.” Do you have the decency at all to even acknowledge me?” “No thanks.”
Lois: “Why do you even talk to them?”
Now I’m gun shy. Everybody I encounter. “No thanks.” “You’re overdoing it,” she tells me. “No thanks.” “That guy wasn’t even talking to you.” “No thanks.” “Stop it! That was just a pregnant lady!” “No thanks.”
Next time I go to the giant mall, I’m wearing shades, muffs, and a mask.
I’ll probably have to go alone.