Christmas Hallmark Movie Addict Checks Herself Into 12-Step Program

Susan Roth, 33, a widow from Clearwater, Florida, told the local Fox News affiliate she had “hit rock bottom” and had no choice but to come to grips with her dependence on the Holiday movie marathon.

“They were relentless”, she lamented, “and I just couldn’t stop.”

With dozens of movies pouring out of the screen every day, it became impossible to watch them all and lead a normal family life. Co-workers, family and friends became concerned when she stopped answering her phone.

In a most tragic turn of events, Roth had let her laundry pile up to the ceiling. She knew she had reached the tipping point when she found her six year old daughter Sydnee sleeping under a mountain of underwear.

Rather than wean off slowly, as professionals typically approach cases of Hallmark Movie Disorder, Miss Roth was diagnosed with “Advanced HMD”. Counselors thereby recommended she go cold turkey, advising, “You know how they’re going to end, anyway.”

Roth spoke to us from the kitchen of her upper middle class suburban home, where she and Sydnee were busy making Christmas cookies, while waiting for her brother to come home from military service in time for the Holiday. Our conversation was interrupted when her high school sweetheart, from whom she hadn’t heard in over fifteen years, surprised her with a call to say he was in town and had something important to tell her.