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Apple Phobia

  Have a fear of heights? Spiders? Crowds? They’re all fairly common. I find them fascinating. But I’ve developed a unique disorder psychologists perhaps haven’t considered. The fear of Apple. Not the fruit. That’s Malusdomesticaphobia.… Read More »Apple Phobia

Your Father is Showing

Going out of your way to help a co-worker? Patiently listening to a friend drone for minutes without taking a breath? Dropping your own plans again to be there for your kids? Excuse me, but…… Read More »Your Father is Showing

Dear Reese’s

You are an amazing product. So amazing, in fact, my relationship with you requires supervision. If I didn’t have Lois as my appointed “Reese’s Cop”, I would indulge day and night in a steady diet… Read More »Dear Reese’s

Phone Home

Changing phone companies? Hold on to something. This gets bumpy. The phone store. Lois is fine. I’m an alien. They speak a language not taught in school. I was clueless. The atmosphere: weird. Large room,… Read More »Phone Home

When I’m 64

When I get older losing my hair many years from now… The song came out when I was nine. The notion that anyone would actually be that old was way off my radar, so “many… Read More »When I’m 64

Christmas is Fleeting!

Christmas is almost over. Don’t blink. You’ll miss it. Remember last year? Seems like yesterday. That makes yesterday seem like 5 minutes ago. You see where I’m going. Time is relentless. It just keeps flying… Read More »Christmas is Fleeting!

What About Me?

I want it. Me first. That’s mine. These are phrases we teach kids to avoid. But even we adults have to ward against them. Our go-to mode is “me.” We’re born to protect and promote… Read More »What About Me?

Those People

  You know who I mean. Those double-standard hypocrites. Those divisive, selfish phonies. If someone would just set them straight! Of course, not us. It’s those other people, right? Yeah. We’re cool. Sure, we have… Read More »Those People